So I’ve been wondering alot on things like my gender, sexuality, and romantic orientation. I’ll start off with my gender.
I have no idea what I am, there are all of these genders that I am still learnnig about, but I know I’m not a complete…girl. I’m not fully the sex I was born in, but I still am ok with my feminine traits that I have. However, I prefer being referred to as he/they. Don’t get me wrong, I’m perfectly fine being called a she, it’s just, I was never once uncomfortable being called he/they. I’d much rather dress like a man than as a woman, and boobs? Take these damn things away from me please. Like, no. Get them off, what is their purpose? I’m not planning on having kids…ever.
My sexuality; is still sort of a mystery to me. I know I’m pansexual, but I can’t help but think now that I could be Asexual. I mean, I never actually felt sexually attracted to anyone, and while yes I can be rather dirty and speak extremely perverted things. I don’t actually want to have sex…like ever. Dildos? No. Fleshlights? Naw man. I’m just…not sexually active, and when people try to tell me I don’t know what I’m missing I just…I feel sort of insulted and extremely uncomfortable. I’d much rather draw NSFW stuff than actually do it. Is that weird?
Lastly, is my romantic orientation. Now this is where shit gets me REALLY confused. I have truly only ever dated the male sex/gender. Two cis males, and one Demiboy. However, a lot of the time, I felt sort of…uncomfortable. Like, I don’t think it died at all, I just didn’t feel right or…ready per say. It’s weird to explain. Generally my relationships don’t last long because of this, and it’s even weirder that I never feel weird loving characters in a romantic way either. To be honest there’s more fictional characters that I’ve fallen for over the years than there are real people. So I considered Akoiromantic…but I don’t think that is what I am. I want to have companionship, fuck, I sort of NEED a companion, I’m a damned mess on my own. But I also want to be able to love and protect someone in a romantic way. I just don’t know what the fuck I am at this point. If there is someone here who can help me, than I am more than willing to listen. Because I am confused as fuck.